Thanksgiving is over

Thanksgiving is over
One holiday less
I’m not too unhappy
I really must confess

For I ate too much
Enjoyed some good cheer
But I am glad that it’s over
At least for one more year

‘cause now I have to
Get a move on
Get ready for Christmas
Soon- before it’s gone

For there on the horizon
As clear as all that
A brand year is lurking
And I am way to fat

So no more turkey no more pie
At least not until Christmas
Here’s mud in your eye

I can’t take it!

I can’t take it!
Give me a break
Its not even thanksgiving
For goodness sake

But look in the stores
And what to your wondering eyes should appear
Already this year

I am just not ready
So stop it, you guys
Let me just enjoy each day
For too fast they fly

No more santas
No more elves
Please take those things
Right off your shelves

And then when all our blessings are surveyed
Bring out the goodies
Do no delay
11/15/99

Butch my girl dog

Butch my girl dog

Some of the facts
Have flown from my mind
As I grow older
I get further behind

But I remember Butch
My one and only canine
One day I went to see Gladys
And then Butch was mine

My mom said Sis listen to me
This puppy is precious to you I can see
Oh yes she is I eagerly agreed
Mom said Father will be upset
I felt treed

Now here is exactly what we must do
And mom whispered her plan in my ear
We had done it before could do it again
Laying the plot we had nothing to fear

We just had to make  my Daddy believe
That he had chosen butch for us
So mom and I plotted our course
We made absolutely NO FUSS

And it went so well
That before very long
Butch ruled the State line
We had not gone wrong

And my Dad loved Butch
That black shorthair
Butch went with Dad
Almost everywhere

For 17 years Butch watched over us
Slept in her bed under the bar
Or slept in the kitchen
Butch never strayed far

But you know what happened
On that very first day
The screen door slammed on her tail
Her tail was cut away

But Butch never knew
What she’d left behind
She just loved us and loved us
She was just our kind.

When smoking was classy

Can you remember
The good old days?
When smoking was classy
As it left its haze

I can remember
The good old days
I was part of the crowd
It has gone away

I loved to smoke
It felt so fine
I loved to smoke
Even as I dined

As I took my bath
I loved to smoke
But the room was small
Sometimes I ‘d choke

But that didn’t matter
Not then – it did not
Why way back then
Smoking was hot

And I remember
When we smoked outside
Then continued doing it
With a lot of pride

What is it you liked?
About this habit of sin
With the smoke all about
And you were wearing a grin?

I don’t mean to go on
About you know what
But then smoking was fun
I’m sorry now it’s not!

I dislike guns

I dislike guns

Truly I dislike guns
And stuff that makes bug noise
But still I do prefer them
To losing my rights boys

So please be very careful
If gun regulations you desire
Too many laws ain’t healthy
Trust and safety aren’t what they inspire

Go easy, please lawmakers
Don’t always rush into fray
Think—“Think” about the aftermath
As you make laws for us today

Mardi Gras

The mistress of ceremonies
In red coat and gold and top hat
President with dignity
On the Saturday night preceding Tuesday Fat

And the candy kiss
Looked simply divine
Her silver lame
Did shimmer and shine

While the brown box of coffee
Percolated here and there
Keeping folks in caffeine
She was everywhere

And there was a hippie
With tremendous green hair
She wore facial tattoos
I saw them there

Two jesters we spied
As they worked the night through
There may have been more
But we say just two

The bar girl so sweet
In her boa and gown
But we say just two

The bar girl so sweet
In her boa and gown
Passed out beads
And some doubloons, which we found

The parade passed by
Too fast for me
I saw a Con Man
And I think one gypsy

They threw kisses more doubloons flew by
Mardi gras was a hoot
For Irene and I

Election day, a national holiday?

Election day, a national holiday?
I think not
Look at all of the other holidays
See just what we’ve got

Whenever a holiday from work appears
No matter the occasion or weather
Everyone who is off from work
Goes shopping or just gets together

The holiday is mere excuse
The purpose behind it forgotten Americans give holidays such abuse
It seems to be a bit rotten

So why make another one
We can abuse those that are
Leave Election Day to just be Election Day
Let’s not take this holiday thing to far!